Edible Monsters - Part Six

This week's monster prefers to seek out very particular victims...

WITCHES' NEST

FREQUENCY: Very Rare
NO. APPEARING: 1
ARMOR CLASS: 6
MOVE: 6"
HIT DICE: 6
% IN LAIR: 50%
TREASURE TYPE:  E
NO. OF ATTACKS: 3
DAMAGE/ATTACK: 2-12
SPECIAL ATTACKS: Paralysis
SPECIAL DEFENSES: Blinding. Cold and fire do not harm
MAGIC RESISTANCE: Immune to fire and cold spells
INTELLIGENCE: Animal
ALIGNMENT: Chaotic Evil
SIZE: M (7' dia.)
PSIONIC ABILITY: Nil
     Attack/Defense Modes: Nil

Witches' Nests are malevolent creatures that appear to be a dense, weed-like bush in form festooned with oddly-shaped pods. They live only in dungeons and similar places, particularly wherever evil magic has been practised. They are especially dangerous to Magic Users or anyone in possession of a magic item, as they are drawn to magical forces. When attacking, they lash out with 6' whip-like thorny limbs, and a successful hit will paralyze their victim if they fail a save vs. paralyzation. Although immune to fire and cold, it can be harmed by electrical attacks. Should the nest lose 75% of its hit points, it will cause its pods to create a great deal of blinding light (as per a Continual Light spell) and endeavour to retreat. If killed, the greater mass of the Nest will quickly become dessicated and wither away to dust, but 8-64 pods will remain along with whatever treasure has been left by previous victims. If the pods are dried, crushed to a powder and added to water, drinking the resulting mixture grants infravision for 1-4 hours to anyone who does not possess this ability. Those that do already possess that ability will find its range doubled for 1-4 hours. However, 12 pods are required per mixture and it may only be taken once every 24 hours.

Description: Witches' Nests are an unruly mass of fibrous matt black limbs, with blood red thorns. Its pods are yellow and resemble indistinct, misshapen faces

Edible Monsters - Part Five

This week's monster may perhaps make an interesting addition to a cave or tunnel entrance...

TITANS' TEETH

FREQUENCY: Very Rare
NO. APPEARING: 4-16
ARMOR CLASS: 5
MOVE: 1/8"
HIT DICE: 1
% IN LAIR: Nil
TREASURE TYPE:  Nil
NO. OF ATTACKS: 0
DAMAGE/ATTACK: Nil
SPECIAL ATTACKS: Nil
SPECIAL DEFENSES: See below
MAGIC RESISTANCE: Standard
INTELLIGENCE: Non-
ALIGNMENT: Neutral
SIZE: S to M
PSIONIC ABILITY: Nil
     Attack/Defense Modes: Nil

Titans' Teeth are a fungus most often found growing in rocky places, stone ruins, caves and tunnels. Certain rumours state that they can also be found on old battlefields and other places of conflict, and will slowly make their way toward any decaying flesh. Their outer shell is quite tough and a great deal of work is needed to break one apart. When this happens, there is a 30% possibility that any exposed skin will be pierced by tiny shell fragments, although this will cause no immediate sensation of pain or discomfort. If this occurs, the skin will start to erupt in 1-4 hours with small, tooth-like growths that will cause a great deal of maddeningly painful itching. Only Cure Light Wounds will rid the victim of such growths which, if left to grow, will slowly and painfully consume the victim in 8-64 days. The main reason that any creatures make such an effort to break Titans' Teeth is because of the spongy, bread-like matter that makes up the core of each growth. This has a pleasant sweet taste and is very nutritious, a pound of which is equivalent to 2 day's good rations. A single 'tooth' will contain 1-8 pounds of such matter.

Description: Titans' Teeth grow in curved rows, and look exactly like a set of human incisors and canines, although much larger in size (at least 2' tall). If found in caves, tunnels, or similar environments it is possible to find a set growing down from above as well as from below. Their outer shell is pearlescent white and smooth, whilst inside they are a dark yellowish-green. They have a somewhat fibrous root system, which is deep red in colour.

Next week: the Witches' Nest...

Edible Monsters - Part Four

This week's monster is an unusual plant that could prove useful to adventurers - as long as they're wary of its defences...

TRAITOR'S HAT

FREQUENCY: Rare
NO. APPEARING: 2-4
ARMOR CLASS: 9
MOVE: 0
HIT DICE: 2
% IN LAIR: Nil
TREASURE TYPE:  Nil
NO. OF ATTACKS: 0
DAMAGE/ATTACK: Nil
SPECIAL ATTACKS: Nil
SPECIAL DEFENSES: See below
MAGIC RESISTANCE: Standard
INTELLIGENCE: Non-
ALIGNMENT: Neutral
SIZE: M
PSIONIC ABILITY: Nil
    Attack/Defense Modes: Nil

The Traitor's Hat can be found in dense, dark woodland, caves, or dungeons. No-one is sure how this insectivorous plant gained such an unusual moniker, although it may be derived from that fact that Stirges sometimes use them as nests. There is a 50% possibility that 1-6 Stirges will be encountered with the Traitor's Hat, although evidence of their residence will be made obvious by the detritus of dead insect parts spread over a 20' wide area around the plant (Stirges always discard such rubbish when nesting). Traitor's Hats consume a variety of insects (including some giant varieties) which they lure using a pleasantly pungent, syrupy liquid pooled in a hollow at the topmost part of their bodies. Their victims are quickly poisoned by this substance and then drop down into the lower part of the plant, which derives sustenance from their decaying remains. The liquid is also poisonous to most other creatures that drink it (including humans and demi-humans) and should be treated as a Type B ingestive posion. However, if the hollow is carefully pierced several times, the liquid slowly percolates down through the body of the plant (a process that takes 1-3 hours) and around 1/2 of one pint can be collected underneath. The poison is thus negated, and anyone consuming all of this half pint will not require food nor drink for a 24 hour period.

Description: The Traitor's Hat is approximately 6' tall and has a conical body with a small hollow at its topmost part. Colors range from vivid orange to dark crimson. The body is supported by a stalk, which is black or dark blue in color.

Next week: Titan's Teeth...

Edible Monsters - Part Three

This week's monster adds something a little crunchier to your diet...

STELGWIT

FREQUENCY: Uncommon
NO. APPEARING: 2-8
ARMOR CLASS: 5
MOVE: 15"
HIT DICE: 3 hit points
% IN LAIR: 15%
TREASURE TYPE:  Nil
NO. OF ATTACKS: 1
DAMAGE/ATTACK: 1-2, 1-6
SPECIAL ATTACKS: None
SPECIAL DEFENSES: Poison
MAGIC RESISTANCE: Standard
INTELLIGENCE: Non-
ALIGNMENT: Neutral
SIZE: S (18" tall, 1' dia.)
PSIONIC ABILITY: Nil
   Attack/Defense Modes: Nil

Stelgwits are spider-like creatures that are most at home in cold, dark places. They shun heat and light, whilst their primary foodstuff seems to be water and other fluids that seep from stone and organic matter. Their many legs are arrayed around a central hub which contains their rudimentary brain, mouth and other internal organs. Fast and able to climb over most surfaces, they are very hard to catch and are usually hunted with nets. Anyone trying to grab a Stelgwit with their bare hands will expose themselves to the poison it excretes from its limbs, although this is not particularly powerful (add +4 to saving throw die roll). If a lair is discovered, there will be around 5-50 creatures of various sizes and in such cases their poison can cause 1-6 hit points of damage (if a standard saving throw vs. poison is failed). As Stelgwits are very averse to heat, proximity to flames from torches and similar fires will cause them to become paralysed. If subdued in such a way and then roasted on an open flame for 5 minutes, the Stelgwit's poison is driven off and its legs become edible. They are crunchy and have a strong savoury, nutty flavour. Consuming 2-3 creatures is enough to replace half a day's rations.

Description: Stelgwits are a pale yellow-white, similar to bone. When cooked, they become a deep reddish brown.

Next week: the Traitor's Hat...

Edible Monsters - Part Two

Ever wondered what the 10' pole in the Player's Handbook might be useful for? Well, perhaps one may come in handy when dealing with this week's monster...

H'MALO

FREQUENCY: Uncommon
NO. APPEARING: 1-8
ARMOR CLASS: 8
MOVE: 3"
HIT DICE: 4 hit points
% IN LAIR: Nil
TREASURE TYPE:  Nil
NO. OF ATTACKS: 1
DAMAGE/ATTACK: 1-6
SPECIAL ATTACKS: None
SPECIAL DEFENSES: Noxious cloud
MAGIC RESISTANCE: Standard
INTELLIGENCE: Non-
ALIGNMENT: Neutral
SIZE: S (1-2' dia.)
PSIONIC ABILITY: Nil
     Attack/Defense Modes: Nil

H'malo are rumoured to be the larval form of some larger monster, although no-one is quite sure which. They prefer to live in damp dark places, where they usually move around in small groups consuming slime and moulds. They are only particularly dangerous if not approached with extreme care, as they seem to be easily alarmed. Attacks, loud noises or sudden nearby movement will cause them to release a pool of liquid that rapidly evaporates, quickly filling a 3' x 3' x 3' area with a noxious, bluish cloud. This cloud causes 1-6 hit points of damage to any creature within it, although the H'malo cannot create another cloud for 4 hours. If more than one H'malo is encountered, each creature will release their own cloud after the first is triggered. Dwarves and other subterranean creatures have discovered that this defense can be negated if the H'malo is approached slowly and quietly, and then flipped over using a pole, spear or item with a similarly long (3' +) reach. If captured in such a way, the H'malo can then be eaten only after it has been immersed in any liquid containing alcohol (beer, wine, etc) and boiled for 10 minutes. This cooking will produce such a delicious aroma that there is a 20% chance it will attract wandering monsters if being prepared in a dungeon, wood or similar place. A cooked H'malo has a similar taste and texture to roast pork or boar, although a H'malo that has recently released its defensive cloud will taste particularly noisome - similarly, any H'malo (alive or cooked) exposed to the cloud will acquire this taste. Adventurers using cooked H'malo will find that it is a useful supplement to rations, extending their duration by 2 days per H'malo carried if kept dry. H'malo are difficult to farm because of their very skittish nature and propensity to contaminate each other should one or more release their defensive cloud.

Description: H'malo are a seemingly unappetising lumpy mass that is pale blue streaked with yellow. Its underside is dark purple. When cooked, H'malo become a yellowish pink and swell to become a more uniform blob of solid flesh that can easily be sliced or cut into smaller chunks.

Next week: the Stelgwit...

Edible Monsters - Part One

In your average FRPG there are always plenty of monsters that will readily eat adventurers. This is handy for the DM, but perhaps less so for the players. I started wondering whether the average dungeon ecosystem might also be home to things that adventurers could possibly eat. With that in mind, I've had a go at designing a bunch of creatures that may be a useful source of sustenance for those poor dungeoneers who are bored to tears with iron rations. But, as there's no such thing as a free lunch, each of these 'foods' will have to be treated with a little caution.

I've written them up in classic 1E Monster Manual style, which has also influenced the look and feel of the artwork. Enterprising DMs should be able to adapt them to their preferred system. I'd be very happy to hear about that!

I'll add a new monster each week, starting with the...

GOURDBUG

FREQUENCY: Uncommon
NO. APPEARING: 2-16
ARMOR CLASS: 6
MOVE: 12"
HIT DICE: 1
% IN LAIR: 40%
TREASURE TYPE:  Nil
NO. OF ATTACKS: 1
DAMAGE/ATTACK: None
SPECIAL ATTACKS: None
SPECIAL DEFENSES: Glue
MAGIC RESISTANCE: Standard
INTELLIGENCE: Animal
ALIGNMENT: Neutral
SIZE: S (6 -12" long)
PSIONIC ABILITY: Nil
     Attack/Defense Modes: Nil

Legend insists that Gourdbugs must have been created by a lawful good Magic User or deity, as they are such incredibly useful creatures. However, as Gourdbugs prefer to live and feed in caves and other places thick with ordure and waste, they can sometimes be found alongside other more dangerous creatures (such as Otyughs). Gourdbugs derive their name from the large sac that grows from their back, which they can burst at will and cover any attacker in a powerful glue-like sap if the creature is threatened or handled incorrectly. This does no harm to the Gourdbug, which grows another sac within 1-6 days. The sap not only has a pleasing taste but can be used to repair bowstrings, clothing, spear sockets and similar items, and is very resilient to heat, damp and cold. It can be dissolved by any liquid that contains alcohol, although this takes quite some time (2-12 hours). Careful hunters know that the Gourdbug must be picked up by its prong-like eye stalks and then gently swung back and forth several times, which causes it to retract its legs and go dormant. Dwarves often hang them from their belts by these stalks. Capturing a Gourdbug is a feat in itself, as they are fast and always try to keep their head facing away from any attacker. They can only be drained via an incision to their underside, which unfortunately also kills the creature but is the only way to preserve the taste of its sap. The sac itself can be removed, dried and used to store liquids, powders and other substances (even those that are poisonous, caustic or acidic). Dissolving the sac in a solution containing alcohol for 1 day causes it to break up into long fibres, which can then be spun for rough thread and stouter chord. A dormant Gourdbug can be kept for 2-8 days before inactivity renders its sap tasteless (although it always retains its glue-like properties). A 12" Gourdbug carries approximately 1 pint of sap, which can usually be sold for 15 s.p. or more. There are several varieties of Gourdbug, each with their own particular taste:

Red: sweet, sugary

Green: spicy, meaty

Blue: red or white wine

Purple: sour, pickle-like

Dwarves have tried to farm Gourdbugs for many years, but to no avail. Attempts to use the Red and Blue varieties as ingredients in brewing have also failed. The creatures seem only to thrive in particular environments and no-one is sure why only those in the wild survive. Adventurers using Gourdbugs as supplies for expeditions will have to carry a great many of them in order to fully supplement their diet, as 4-6 would have to be consumed per day in order to replace rations. Half-orcs find the taste of any Gourdbug very unpalatable and it is thought that this also the case for orcs, goblins, hobgoblins and similar creatures.

Description: Gourdbugs are streaked and mottled with various shades of their basic color. The insect-like parts of their bodies seem polished and robust, whilst the sac appears both fibrous and semi-opaque.

Next week: the H'Malo...